kmoe - K1

     Certain music keeps a hold on you long after you've first heard it. As far as I can tell, there's no way of initially knowing whether this will be the case. I've heard new projects that I loved and never went back to, and in other cases I've slowly been introduced to projects that have gradually become recurring themes in my life. kmoe's first album, "K1", is one of those projects. Released in June of 2025, I was first introduced to the project through the single "do I keep you up". Which I only learned much later was a part of his larger project. I believe music is a very personal experience for both the artist, and each individual listener, and as such the way I write about music is different from how readers may be accustomed to seeing. I do not score music, I don't think there is any value added to the conversation by applying a number to any sort of artistic work, I only think that we can appreciate and/or critique the art as we see fit while understanding that others will likely feel differently. I have no critiques for this project, and in any case, I prefer to talk about things that I love and appreciate. As I'm writing this I'm going back through and listening to each song, I believe there will be much to talk about so I will take it one song at a time, starting with this one.

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do i keep you up

     This song first struck me as influential when I heard the opening lines "I think I finally know the point of this, went out in a sheer dress, if you can't afford me, then I can't afford this." I don't know the exact intention behind the lyric, but I know exactly what it meant to me. This lyric came at a time in my life when I was really struggling with identity. I've always struggled with identity, coming out as transgender in high school to a few close friends and my sister, and then just months later retracting it out of fear. Since then I've always been on the fence about my gender identity but chosen to stress about it less these days, I am just who I am and I just like what I like. The idea of presenting myself in a "sheer dress" feels romantic, dangerous, and freeing. Hearing these lines spoken so confidently from a man validated my thoughts and was surprisingly emotional. I would replay the beginning of this song over and over in my car just to hear that line, I'm still not sure what it meant to kmoe or if it had an entirely different intended meaning or not, but the beautiful thing about music is that it doesn't really matter whether my experience as a listener was the intended one. I don't believe Kmoe wrote these lyrics for an intended audience anyways, and as we will explore further with the coming songs, that is a piece of what makes their presentation so special.

     Each lyric feels like it was written poetically about specific instances in kmoe's life, and on this song "do I keep you up" the climax comes with the heart wrenching statement "I'm gone when you needed me most." As kmoe sings this lyric he alternates freely between a beautiful falsetto and a lower, more natural tone. After this line he poses the question "Isn't it the same when I'm here and you're there alone?" following it with the title lyric, "Do I keep you up at night waiting by the phone?" I'm consistently struck by the way these phrases are written, they read like a journal entry, or an unsent letter to someone who might be painful to reach out to. The questions reflect a conversation, and the wavering vibrato of Kmoe's voice as he shouts into the microphone remind me that this conversation has no clear resolution. "do I keep you up" is full of heartbreaking tension that feels doomed to be unresolved, a feeling that many people are familiar with in their own private little ways. I guess the song comforts me in this way, by reminding me that I am not the first to experience these emotions.

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Thousand yard stare

     I wrote a whole section here about the production and mix presented in this song.. It is so hard to write about audio engineering in a way that reads well so I've decided to skip it.. Just know that I find the production throughout this entire project very impressive and quite creative in terms of how certain elements are presented, especially when there is so much fluid variation in these presentations throughout even a single track, but often between songs as well, while still maintaining a cohesive sound. kmoe's voice bleeds in and out of the mix here, sometimes complimenting the grungy guitar as if a sibling to it, other times front and center with nothing but a plucked bassline to accompany. By far the highlight of this song is the way in which kmoe leads us into the climax, crying out the word "alone". There is variation even here, with the first verse telling a story of mental turmoil in the face of physical separation "A nightmare stuck in my head while she lies there alone" and the last verse leading us to the same climax with a different lead-in, "Will you be there when I die? On the surface or below, I don't know. alone" The power of these vocals are complimented by screaming guitars and the resulting unease in moments when they are taken away. As a listener I know from the moment the guitars are taken away that they will inevitably arrive again. Just before they do, I find myself bracing for impact and when they come I let them envelop me and take me elsewhere.

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Watershed

     The moment I realized that I was doing a disservice by not listening to "K1" in it's entirety was when "Watershed" was recommended to me. The melodic and lyrical elements of this song compliment each other in such a way that I cannot listen to it without being faced with thoughts and questions about my life that I unconsciously push to the wayside time and time again. Music is such a subjective and beautiful thing, it's difficult to talk about convincingly when you know you cannot share these exact experiences from person to person. There are so many lyrics in this song that I resonate with, starting with, "And I can't tell which way is up and what's down" "I've got no more hope, what's done is done." In the past I’ve been in relationships where I felt like I was constantly making excuses for the other person and giving myself copious amounts of undeserved hope. It eventually gets to the point where you break and concede that you have no more hope left to give. Another line that hits me where it hurts is "why do I feel like I don't need anyone's help?" Because time and time again I try to do things alone that would obviously be much easier with a little bit of help. It’s hard to ask for help sometimes, and even harder to convince yourself that you need it. "Why can't I be anything or anyone else?" ..speaking of identity crisis, this is a reoccurring thought I've had throughout my life, one that feels isolating and depressing, but comforting to know others might feel the same too. Last year I caught a bit of a smoking habit which I was and am still very self conscious about, especially given my upbringing and the constant reminders not to smoke. When kmoe sings the lyric, "yellowing teeth, is it worth breathing it out?" I feel camaraderie in the thoughts that tell me my teeth are already ruined, and the damage is done. There are many more gorgeous lyrics in here such as, "weakened in plaster, everything cracks." Which brings up ideas of false sufficiency, and relates back to the lyric about wondering why I think I don’t need anyone’s help.

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don't be like mouse

     I wanted to finish this article with my favorite song, "don't be like mouse" which has the strongest grip on me emotionally. This song is a wild ride, man. Starting off with the lyric, "It's feeling much worse now than when I started." "If this is what we live for then I don't want it anymore." These are some super cutting lyrics that could be taken in many literal ways, the way I hear it is through a few different contexts, one being as a musician who has worked so hard for so long to garner an audience, only for the payoff to not move the needle emotionally in a way you might’ve expected. Another context that suits these lines is just life in general. I know as children we all look bright eyed towards the day when we’re an adult so that we can have the freedom and the privileges that we want so badly, but for many of us, myself included, growing older feels much more like a striking loss of freedom and privilege. This loss can be confusing, and consuming. My adult freedom has culminated into a dead end janitorial job, is this what I live for? I don’t want it.

    When I hear the very next line, “Now I’m lost in my own house, how did you get out?” This sounds like a cry for help as you watch someone else who is seemingly unaffected by fear or shame, and who is able to break down the barriers that would otherwise keep their life in a state of wishful thinking. A state that the narrator is hoping to escape from. I think when I hear music, even though I try to see lyrics from the artist’s point of view, oftentimes *I* am the narrator, because we can never really truly put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. I feel the need to reiterate that because my interpretations are so clearly a representation of my own emotional state, and not necessarily kmoe’s. Even though he wrote the lines. Either way, I want to express gratitude towards kmoe for this incredible project and performance, and at the bottom of this article you’ll find links to all the ways you can support him if you enjoyed as well.

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     Maybe I am drawn to K1 because I feel a connection to the gut-wrenching sadness presented throughout these songs, or maybe I am drawn to it because the music is just so convincingly raw. If anyone wants to support kmoe, I recommend buying the vinyl for this album and putting it on display in your home so all of your friends can see how cool you are.. if anyone wants to buy ME this vinyl.. please reach out because I want it badly and cannot afford it...

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